4)

Millions of people believe in you, almost nobody in me, and yet I exist ...
I am only a man, whatever that means: a conscious being, a biological machine, a psychophysical subject, an animal aware of its miserable fate, its weakness and imperfections, its limitations and its mortality, or its nothingness and redundancy in the world ...

But you are all-powerful, all-knowing, perfect, immortal, unlimited ... but I exist; in an imperfect, defective, pointless, absurd, hopeless, limited, adulterated and desperate way ...

You are adored by millions, they are begging you for grace, for happiness, peace, security, wealth, fame, love and life after death ...

Millions of people serve you, they expect help from you, you are the last hope of saving their imperfect and senseless existence, you are their master and savior, their liberation and "eternal life" ...

But I am nobody, I believe in nothing, I serve nothing, I live for nothing, but still exist ...

What can you ask from me, what can you promise me, how can you give me hope, how can you save me (when I want salvation in this life, not in a posthumous, possible, fictional, imaginary life)

- since I am not sure if you exist, if you do not I know no answers, since I don't know what is true, if I don't know what I'm living for, if I don't know if you exist ...

How can you prove to me that you are not just my invention, or the invention of your ancestors? ...

In fact, I don't care if I am a pawn in your game, or anyone else's (nature, universe, demiurge, God, Allah, Buddha, the deceiver's demon, or even "my" unconscious, the overexcitement that is the cause of my hallucinations, which I take for the world and projections what I myself am, if I am, something other than I think I am) ...

Should I believe in you only because they threaten me with hell, with eternal damnation, death or non-existence? If you existed, you probably would not want to be believed in for fear or for material or spiritual benefits (even if it would only be a cure for the fear of death) ...

Do you think that if people lived forever without feeling any physical or mental discomfort, if they knew the whole truth, they would believe in you?

I prefer not to believe anything anymore and consider everything as absurd and senseless than to believe something unfounded for which I have no evidence whatsoever;

I prefer to consider you the work of the collective imagination of "humanity" as it is more likely;
I prefer to be on the side of the truth, no matter if it is favorable to me or not, because it is the only thing worth believing in;
The legend written by your followers proclaims that truth is sin, evil and crime, and that whoever desires to know it deserves condemnation, like the "first men";

How can you believe that you care about 6 and a half billion people living on a subordinate planet, in one of an infinite number of universes, which is, in comparison, just a grain of sand ...

How is it possible not to take all of this as obviously absurd?

PS.

As I write these words, I do not recognize your existence as an indisputable fact, but having no way of proving or denying that existence (apart from people's minds and the works of their thoughts),

I accept such a hypothesis as possible (at worst I am writing to someone who does not exist, which would prove negatively not only about my mental health,

but almost all of humanity),

which allows me to use a more interesting literary procedure, for most readers, than a philosophical essay or scientific analysis (which would be pointless in the case of an idea that is impossible to prove or disprove).

In addition, I do not mean to offend anyone's religious feelings or to provoke the supporters of this idea, but to express my philosophical deliberations in an interesting way, which, referring to Locke, does not harm the concept under test, because it allows us to see it from another perspectives and strengthen or weaken (both would serve the truth as well).

As Fryderyk Nietzsche said: "I don't believe in anything anymore" - this is the proper way of thinking of a creative person. "
       
PPS.

I will probably soon hear that I am profaning the sacred or sacralizing the profane, it does not matter, since the matter is lost anyway, because, as Kafka rightly said: "Experience yourself on the example of humanity.

It strengthens the doubter in doubt, and strengthens the believer in faith ”. Moreover, as you know, people must have a reason to believe, which I have already written about.

First of all, it is easier for them to believe in an abstract idea than in themselves, a theory may be perfect, reality not, the same with God and man, it is easier to believe in fiction (almighty creator, etc.) than in an imperfect psychophysical being, not to mention the fact that what religion promises us - life after death, free will, answers instead of doubts, peace of "spirit", etc.

Do we value the unfavorable truth that we do not know the truth more, which means anxiety and doubts for us, or the psychological peace that religions provide us or ideologies? - this is one of the most important questions.

Marek Wojnicki